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The slam of water is heard through the wall in my kitchen of our small apartment. It had been like this for almost an hour. I get concerned and I knock on the door, once I got no response I was starting to panic slightly, so I forcefully open the lock to hear the sound of water even louder as I entered the bathroom. She sat there, a beautiful woman, the one I fell in love with years ago. She sat in the shower fully clothed, with her head resting in her arms and her arms resting in her legs. She was literally sat in a ball being hammered in by the cold water. My first instinct is to go be with her, so fully clothed as well, I enter the shower and sit beside her, dealing through the cold that she enjoyed. I tell her I’m going to make it ok and I get little response. I knew what was wrong, it was not the first time this had happened. I take her hand and slide my hand up to her wrist and she winces. “I know” I say keeping complete eye contact, as I turn her wrist over to see the 3 cuts on the inner side of her forearm. The were blood red, as if they happened a little while ago, they looked sore. “I know” I say again before I bow my head to kiss the wounds as tender as I possibly could. I tell her I will make it better, I want too and I need too. She tilted the back of her head to me as I continued to wash her haif, considering we where in the shower, she leans on me and I see her tears mix into the water. I kiss her neck and I hold her like there is no tomorrow, I had to look after her, she was mine.

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I would be happy in seeing you sad one day and happy the other, in knowing that I would be able to make you smile again. I always want to help you because your certainly worth it. And no your not destructive, but if you say all of this, then leave, leaving everybody to hate you, so they don’t miss you. Leaving every body to not hurt but yourself. That’s one of the most upsetting, sweetest things I’ve ever heard. I miss you, come back.

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